people's perspectives

Over the past few days, I have spoken with friends about their perspectives on birth. Originally, I interviewed four people- three females and one male, but, unfortunately, the male’s interview lacked enthusiasm and interest, and thus I decided not to use it. After the interview, I realized that the questions I had prepared were somewhat biased so I learned that for future interviews, I must prepare questions of all sorts, for a diverse group of people.

I was only able to interview one person face-to-face, while the others were done over the phone and Internet. This may have also contributed to the lack of interest that the one male had. "What have your parents communicated to you about your birth?" I asked as an introduction question. Each interviewee responded with solely their weight, hospital and time of birth, which initially bored me, but I later reconsidered. 

I then asked my interviewees if they have any desire to have a child in the future. "Although I'm interested in adopting a child (or children) I want to have a child of my own because I feel like the connection built over the nine months of the baby growing inside of you is strong. Women also posses beautiful powers, so why not use them?" Kai told me. I laughed at that and she added that "something growing inside of you" is a weird phrase, and she said that it made her think of aliens, or a different species. I asked her if she thinks of babies as different species, and she said yes, which was odd considering there was a baby laying next to us (her nephew) as we spoke. 

Belinda's response came from a different perspective: "I want to have kids because I feel like it’s a struggle that I have to face that will make me stronger. Every woman in my family has been an independent mother, and I feel like I will too. Its not what I want, its just a pattern I've noticed." I asked her if she thought that being an independent mother contributes to the strength of the woman and she said yes. Jennifer, on the other hand wrote "NO" in capital letters when I asked if she was interested in having a child. She viewed having children as burdens, and thought it would only contribute to her financial stresses. She also said that she couldn't see herself being responsible for a human life. When I asked her if she saw any positive aspects about birth, she said that the concept of being a parent and molding a person was beautiful, but that it wasn't "for her".  I admired her honesty.

When I asked Kai and Belinda if they ever thought about what kinds of births they would want to have, they both responded by saying that they would want a natural birth. Kai said that she would want a water birth, and Belinda told me that she didn't know enough about alternatives to form an opinion.

My final question was a question I heard posed in the classroom that I was intrigued by. "Which is seen as a greater moment for you? Birth or death?" Although I'm not too sure this question is phrased correctly, because I don't know if "greater" is the proper word for what I am trying to get across, each of my interviewees responded with more depth than to any of the other questions I asked. Belinda thought that death was greater on a short-term level, but that birth was greater on a long-term level. When I asked her why, she responded by saying that death's permanence strikes hard, but that so much greatness comes from one life. 

Jennifer said that she didn't care all too much about birth, and that she was bored with babies. She also said that she's experienced many births in her family, and only one death in her family, which has impacted her deeply. I felt that Kai's response was the most intriguing. She thought about the question for a while and when she finally spoke, she said, "That’s a really weird question" and asked me to repeat it. "I'm not really sure because my last encounter with death was also my last encounter with birth" I asked her to explain: "My aunt, who had Alzheimer’s and needed constant care, had been taken care of only by me and she died at 2:00pm. Later that night, my brother's girlfriend went into labor and the baby was born." She believed that both equally impacted her and that the mixed emotions on that day brought difficulty. She wanted to be happy for the new life, but also struggled with the death. "I lost one, but gained one as well." She turned over and slapped the baby’s butt while he slept, and he started to cry. "That’s my cue to leave,” I told her.  

Through the conversations that I had with my friends, I learned about their beliefs and perspectives surrounding birth, which contributed to my understanding of my generation’s attitudes towards this life experience. Although each interviewee was born in the same type of environment (a hospital), each had different opinions about birth. Kai wants to have a baby and is looking forward to the experience of pregnancy, birth and motherhood, whereas Jennifer has no desire to have a child. Belinda did express the desire to have a child but envisions herself most likely being a single parent. Interestingly enough, Belinda uses the term “independent parent” rather than “single” which might be an indication of our generation’s more empowered sense of the possibilities of single parenthood. While the girls showed an awareness of the varied possibilities of parenthood, they didn’t seem to have the same knowledge of the various possible birth options. Belinda had a vague sense of what a natural childbirth really entailed while Kai only learned about “water births” through conversations with me. These perspectives from my peers helped me construct a better sense of where my generation stands in their knowledge about birth. I hope to share what I’ve learned, as we continue through this unit, to further the empowerment of my generation.

first (recorded) thoughts on birth

Every year on the morning of our birthdays, my parents made a practice of telling my siblings and I the stories of our births. These stories were also often told to other family members and friends at the dinner table, mostly because people were amazed by the difference in which my parents chose to bring us into this world- home births! When I was younger, I hadn't realized that it was unusual to have home births in the United States but now when I tell people that I was born in my own home, they're usually surprised. 

I've recently seen a film called "The business of being born" a documentary that explores birthing practices in the United States. Whereas my parent sought to have control over our births and to make it as natural as possible, the typical birth in this country is controlled by doctors and hospital regulations who utilize practices that are not always in the best interest of the mother or child. For example, many hospitals routinely perform cesarean sections simply because it takes less time and allows the doctors to control the schedule of the birth. In contrast, my mother relied upon the same mid wife (Rene Smith) for three of her births and was able to take as much time as she needed to produce the babies- naturally. In the hospitals, babies are typically taken away from their mothers immdediately after their born for tests and in some cases, to be incubated. This prevents the baby from bonding immediately with the mother and breast feeding which has been shown to help the mother stop bleeding after birth. 

Now my step mother is pregnant and will have her first baby in August. I am now old enough to be a part of the process and this has led me to develop several questions about what to expect: Why do we put our trust into the hands of the hospitals when we know that their primary motive in providing health services is to minimize their costs and liabilities?  How did it happen to be that birthing, which is one of the most natural human acts(along with death) to be come so medicalized? Why are so many women encouraged to be passive when they interact with doctors and hospitals about their needs and rights as an expecting mother? And finally, how has the media's portrayal of births differed in recent years from the way it has been depicted in the past? How will my step mother handle the fears that are raised in her interactions with the doctors as the date of her birth approaches? Will she chose to make her own decisions or will she become passive and look to the doctors to control the process?

Comments (3)

Younger Person (Emma Levene- Nevel): "Naima- Let me start by saying that you are truly a wonderful writer. All of your pieces are a beautiful mixture of thoughtfulness, personal experience, and amazing insight. I think that this piece offers an interesting perspective regarding an aspect of illness that is often ignored. In your discussion of "The Motorcycle Diaries" (which I really want to see!), you mention multiple instances in which Che acknowledges that the "lepors" are being stigmatized for their illness and thus isolated from society- not because they have to be isolated, but because the community can't and won't accept them. I think that Che's resistance to this inhumane treatment is indicative of his passion for social justice and his recognition that everybody, even those with mental and physical disabilities, are just as human as everybody else. I think that you share those same beliefs, which are reflected in this piece. I think that your connection to cancer is also really interesting. If you were to elaborate on this piece, I think you could elaborate on how, specifically, people with cancer become isolated from their surroundings, maybe using your personal experience to develop your points. Overall, I think the piece was very well written, and I can't wait to read more!"


Older Person (Joaquin Noguera):
"I appreciate how you tied it all together in your closing sentences, Naima. Using Che's language to describe those that not only empathize with the I'll, specifically cancer patients and survivors, but in doing so also combat the stigma surrounding those with such illnesses, you inadvertently praise the "wise" for their greater understanding and encourage the reader that taking such an approach is to do good! I too love the concept of treating or viewing those who see the human behind the illness as "wise folk", almost more evolved or awakened/enlightened beings. I think everyone is "wise", in this way, in some aspect of their life. Too often, people confine their "wisdom" too only a few aspects of their reality. Too often does that wisdom not transfer over to other parts of life. This empathy, this wisdom, is one major distinguishing feature of humans and the "most wise" know that there are few aspects of our lives where it should not apply. I would argue that whether the issue is war, health control, immigration, crime and punishment, etc, our ability to listen, care for and about, and empathize with others can be a measure of a peoples evolutionary development.

Let's all work on being a little more wise, Eh?

Thanks Nai.

Love,
Joaquin"

stigma and leprosy

I would like you(the reader) to please excuse me for not devoting as much time as I would have liked to this project on the exploration of illness and dying. I have not been feeling too well myself the past few days, so I gathered my research on the resources that I had in my home: my computer.

Not feeling well made me think more about sickness and how it can define your identity if the illness is severe and prolonged (unlike mine). This got me thinking about the concept of stigma and how it relates to sickness and has affected the way we treat people in our society. Although there are many ways in which a group of people may be stigmatized- homosexuality, obesity, criminal records, disabilities, race, religion, etc.- sickness has been one way in which groups have been stigmatized and shunned throughout history. But not all illnesses lead to stigma! Some illnesses like heart disease and diabetes generally don't result in the person with the affliction being shunned. We often think its unfortunate that they are sick and take pity on the people, but we are less likely to feel disgusted and want to avoid them. However, there are other illnesses that evoke deeply rooted reactions among people. For example, syphilis, HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases often bring out a moral reaction and judgment. So too diseases that disfigure a person's body and face such as elephantitis and leprosy (now known as Hansen's disease).

I was reminded of how people with leprosy have historically been stigmatized on Friday night. That night, the love that I had for the actor Gael Garcia Bernal was once again rejuvenated by watching two of his films. Having been glued to my bed, my only source of entertainment came from Netflix, a long lost friend. First I watched The Science of Sleep, and then I watched The Motorcycle Diaries. The Motorcycle Diaries tells the story of young Ernesto "Che" Guevara and Alberto Granado; two young Argentine doctors who tour South America on their motorcycle and on foot. It chronicles their journey through small towns and villages in the Andes and the southern cone. In one section of the film, the two doctors find themselves in San Pablo, Peru, a remote village in the amazonian region that is also a lepor colony. 

Ernesto and Alberto are brought to the colony by boat, led by another doctor. They are handed gloves and are told not to touch the patients. Ernesto asks whether or not the people are contagious and is told "not by touch," He then asks why he needs to wear the gloves and refuses to put them on. The remainder of this part of the film focuses on Ernesto and Alberto's refusal to accept the stigma of the lepors. They do this largely by treating them as if they were regular humans (how they should be treated!) For example, there is a scene where the Argentine doctors play a game of soccer with the "lepors" and the people are clearly enjoying themselves, for what seems like the first time in many years. Even the nuns, who worked among the "lepors" try to discourage Ernesto and Alberto from eating and spending time among them. Like the other health workers, the Argentine doctors are expected to live on the opposite side of the river, apart from the lepors. In one of the most dramatic scenes in the film, Ernesto decides at his birthday party that he would rather celebrate with the lepors than the so-called "normal people". There was no way for him to get across the river so he decided to take a big risk and swim to the other side. 

Ernesto's action made me think that the best way to counter stigma is to treat people humanely- as if they were normal. According to Erving Goffman in "Stigma and Social Identity," Ernesto is a "wise" person who acts as a bridge between the stigmatized lepors and the rest of society. He writes: "I have considered one set of individuals from whom the stigmatized person can expect some support: those who share his stigma and by virtue of this are defined and define themselves as his own kind. The second set are- to borrow a term once used by homosexuals- the 'wise,' namely, persons who are normal but whose special situation has made them intimately privy to the secret life of the stigmatized individual and sympathetic with it, and who find themselves accorded a measure of acceptance, a measure of courtesy membership in the clan. Wise persons are the marginal men before whom the individual with a fault need feel no shame..." By refusing to wear gloves and risking his life to celebrate his birthday with them, Ernesto showed that he was sympathetic toward the "lepors" in a way that was different even from the nuns and other doctors who helped them. Ernesto chose to treat the "lepors" as though he were no better than them and because he did, he was accepted by them.  

After reading Goffman and watching the Motorcycle Diaries, my mind went back to how our society deals with people who have other forms of illnesses like cancer. Cancer may not be like leprosy in that people who have cancer are not physically isolated nor are they shunned by their communities. However, people with cancer often say that the only people who understand what they're going through are other people who have been diagnosed with cancer. In this way, they can become socially and psychologically isolated from family and friends who may not understand what its like to cope with an illness thats eating away at your body. Because of progress in modern medicine, there are a growing number of people who survive from cancer. There are also a lot of people who have family members and loved ones who have suffered from cancer and in some cases died. Some of these people become "wise" like Ernesto. And like Ernesto, they can be advocates for countering the stigma against cancer patients.

Comments (2)

My partners hadn't done the assignment, but...


Younger person (Cai Oglesby):
"This was incredibly emotional and beautifully described. I love the idea of isolation making such a big difference in the process of death. I'd never thought of it like that before, but it makes so much sense.


However, couldn't this idea also be reversed? Not to be morbid, but why does being surrounded by happiness make it easier? Shouldn't that make it harder, since you know you're going to have to leave all your loves behind? Whereas if you're unhappy in your last years, you can be looking forward to an end to that pain instead. I'm not sure which I agree with but that's just something to think about."


Older person (Joaquin Noguera):
"Oooh, I like what Cai wrote.

This might be my favorite of your writings so far. The descriptive language used to provide the reader with what you experienced when you saw Tio Ricardo is very well put together. You describe his face, how clothe looked on his body, your feelings... and you involve the senses which really allows the reader to feel present.

The two paragraphs that follow are also well done. You provide the reader with a vivid description of the exchange that took place on the couch. Knowing Tio Ricardo and Grandma, I felt like it was a scenario I had seen before many times.

You have an ability to make your words into something more Naima. Not everyone knows how to use words to make people FEEL. Good job with this one bebe.

Cool feedback: I think that many would benefit from a translation of EACH statement you present that is in Spanish. I may be wrong but I remember only 1 of your statements in Spanish being translated.

Love you,

Joaquin"

Visiting an unwell person

During my winter vacation, I went to Peru with my grandmother (I refer to her as mama).  Unfortunately, she was only pleased when I hung out with her and her friends who were all people her age (she’s 80 years old). Because of her possessiveness, I was able to visit many elderly people who were quite sick. Each visit began with mama"s friends telling me I look exactly like my mother. This would be followed by “I haven’t seen you since you were this big! (motioning with there hands close to the ground).  Then finally, my grandmother would tell her friends a story about how much trouble she had getting me from the airport or another story that I had heard already. 

The visit that stuck out for me the most was when we went to see my tio Ricardo. When I had visited Peru in my younger ages, we always stayed at his house. I remember that tio Ricardo would always buy my brother and I Sublime’s (Peruvian chocolate), and often took my brother and I to the arcade and parks where we could release our childhood energy. I always thought of my tio Ricardo as a man of much strength and power. I began to think about some of the stories that my father told me about my mother's past. My uncle was one of my mother's guardians when she was younger and the only father figure she knew. He was often portrayed in these stories as a strong, strict man.

This visit to see my uncle was different from the many others. Mama now has an apartment not far from his in Miras Flores.  This time we stayed there instead of my tio Ricardo’s home. The last time I went to Peru was the summer before ninth grade. I went with my brother on a program called Visions.  We went with other high school students to the Andean highlands of Peru to build a school and brick ovens in a town called Urubamba. After our program ended we spent a week with mama in Lima.  At the time, she and tio Ricardo were in the midst of a feud, and visiting him was out of the question. They were on good terms before I visited this time, and she was eager to visit him, which we did on my second day in Peru. 

When we arrived his apartment, we rang his doorbell, and it took what seemed like forever for him to open the door. While we waited in the hallway of his apartment building for him to welcome us, I heard a cane tapping the floor and the sound of feet being dragged. Opening the door, his eyes gleamed at the sight of his sister and grand niece, and he embraced us both. I noticed that his hair was as white as I saw it last, but everything else was different. His cheekbones stuck out, eyes sunk in, and his skin yellowed. His pants hung loosely on his legs, and it appeared as though he had lost about 30 pounds since the last photo I saw of him, which was not that long ago. When he put his arms around me, I could feel the bones beneath his shirt and I was sure that he had become frail, and I grew uncomfortable.

 What surprised me most about seeing my uncle was his isolation. Although he had family and friends throughout Lima, and a wife that he was estrange from, at the age of 86, my tio Ricardo lived alone. His isolation seemed to add to his vulnerability. I imagined that on days when he felt tired or weak, there was no one there to cook him a meal or even bring him water. I also thought that if he were lonely and wanted to speak with someone, he wouldn't have anyone to share it with. Unlike Morrie, who was surrounded with people during the last years and months of his life, my tio Ricardo lives alone and keeps his suffering to himself. 

My grandmother bought him a large box of See’s famous chocolate. He smiled and told her that he was thankful, but he’d hardly started the one she brought him months before. I had trouble understanding him when he spoke. At first i thought it might be my Spanish, but then I realized that his words were slurred. This might have been due to the teeth that were missing from his mouth or the medication that he had been taking. He sat on his couch, and I consciously choose to sit across from him while mama sat at his side. Mama was in mid sentence of telling my tio about her favorite show- Doctor Phil, when she abruptly excused herself to use the bathroom. My uncle looked at me and motioned for me to sit next to him. I walked over to the couch where he sat, and it was then that I noticed he was almost blind. I hadn’t brought my glasses with me that day and so I wasn’t able to absorb in full detail my uncle’s condition. He asked me to bring my face close to his, and I followed his instructions. “Pareces igualito como to mama!” He said, and then kissed me on my cheek and began to cry. His hand reached up into his sweater, and he pulled out a napkin. “Es mi culpa.” My arms touched his shoulders as he continued to cry, and tears began to slip out of my eyes. He repeated my mother's name, “Patricia, Patricia.” When mama returned from the bathroom, she noticed our tears, and handed us tissues while my uncle wrapped up our session. “Entonces, a donde van a almozar?” he asked where we were going to eat. I excused myself and walked out over to the balcony. Down below I saw miniature Nasca lines in the park, where children ran, trying to find their way back to their mothers.

I shot some photos and then returned to the room where they continued to speak about food. The conversation went on, even though my uncle didn’t eat much these days. When it was time to leave, my uncle made no promise of seeing me soon. He embraced me once again right before I entered the elevator and I said "Cuidate". He smiled and walked back to his apartment.

I realized during my brief visit with my uncle that I was overwhelmed with sorrow for him because his isolation seemed to add to his suffering. It also made me think about how different Morrie's last months of his life were because he was surrounded by family and friends. Maybe it was this social support that made it possible for Morrie to be so accepting of his death. At least in his last days, he had the comfort of others and knew he was loved and appreciated. 

Looking back and forward in our unit

This illness and dying unit has provoked a lot of thoughts that I had unconsciously chosen not to confront and analyze. As I have written in several of my blog entries, I have had a personal experience with death having lost my mother. Through the readings, films and class discussions I've developed a deeper understanding on illness and dying and the way these issues are perceived in our culture. I've also begun to develop a more concrete perspective on the issue of mortality and I've become clearer in my critique of the way our society handles issues related to illness and dying.

Some ideas, insights and items of information that I've learned in our illness and dying unit so far...

• "Doctors with the highest percentage of denials get a bonus." (Sicko)

From the movie Sicko (Michael Moore, 2007), I have developed an understanding of the ways in which corporations have distorted the health care system so that it favors the wealthy and those lucky enough to have good health insurance. Michael Moore's film showed me that America's health care system is in many ways corrupt and unjust.  Instead of being focused on how to insure that people receive the best possible health care, the corporations that run the health care industry are more concerned with maximizing profit. 

• When people become fatally ill, they are expected to be ashamed of their decaying bodies. Its seen as abnormal if they're not. (Tuesdays with Morrie)

Unlike the majority of people, Morrie grew to accept his decaying body during his final months. At first he was ashamed that he had to depend on other people to "wipe his ass." Later he chose to think more positively about this and compared the needs of his old age to those of babies.

• Our culture looks for technological quick fixes rather than solving the root of the problem.(class discussion) 

This is a pervasive problem seen in all of the areas we've discussed over the course of this semester. For example, during the food unit, we watched Food Inc. where they showed how instead of feeding cows their natural diet, they're given unhealthy food substitutes that harm them and the environment. As the "quick fix" they drown the meat in ammonia to clean it instead of practicing sustainable farming and feeding methods.

• There is a large disconnection that humans tend to feel from illness and dying.(Tuesdays with Morrie)

People also tend to see themselves as detached from nature, and don't understand the nature of dying. I've also come to understand that when people grow ill to the point of death, their bodies slowly decay, which society doesn't view as normal and thus feel very disconnected from.
 

The source that has been most helpful for me was the book Tuesday's with Morrie because the author focused the attention of the book on Morrie's critiques and insights about dominant social practices. I also found that it helped me a lot because I was able to relate to Morrie in a weird way, and I often found myself thinking about something that he said.

The book provided me with flashbacks of my mothers illness, and I was able to compare and contrast Morrie's story to my mother's. Morrie's willingness to accept his death, even as he simultaneously seeks to fully experience every aspect of life before he dies, is an approach to mortality that I hadn't considered before.  Through this, I realized that death's permanence isn't the only element of reasons why we haven't learned to accept death.

In the final weeks of the class I think its important to take a less Eurocentric perspective on these issues. I would be interested in learning about how cultures beyond American and Canadian face and understand illness and dying. Additionally, I think we should explore holistic forms of medicine, and how certain societies have chosen to take that approach. I hope that we can explore this through research and classroom discussions where students would be able to share stories from their own cultural backgrounds.